I need advice please. I'm 21 year old male, my parents are trying to find me a girl to get married to. There is a girl who's parents are also finding a boy. I used to have a major crush on her a few years back and I very stupidly tried to get with her back then. She rejected me, why I'm not entirely sure but it's very possible that it was out of her duties as a Muslimah. (we were good friends in school, and we got along really well.)
One of the high points I like about her was how religious she was. I try to be too, but evidently I was falling short when I was trying to go for her.
Anyways she rejected me. Now about 2-3 years later, both our parents are looking for someone, I want to in sha Allah, try asking her again.. But I'm not sure how to go about it. Since then we are on talking terms again but it was very very awkward for me because of how I was behaving with her and I really just want to apologise to her about it all but I haven't had the chance to because I haven't seen her in a while.
I want to try to ask her now but I'm afraid of rejection from her once again and I'm totally unsure how to bring it up without sounding like a weirdo. I can't just message her and tell her I'm interested because I feel like she will most likely just think I'm still stuck in my old mindset. I can't go straight to her parents because the final decision rests with her and if she doesn't agree then there would've been no point to talk to her parents.
I have already talked to my own parents and in fact it was my mum who actually came to me asking if I was interested in this girl. I told her about the incident which occurred and she told me to maybe ask her again about it. I just want advice on how to go about this.
I want this to be a halal relationship with blessing. I've been in a sinful relationship before and I prayed so much for it to work but praying for a sinful relationship is like banging your head against a wall, if it's haram there is no blessing in it. Just lessons you can take, and I have certainly learnt my lesson.
I totally get that if she doesn't want to, there's nothing I can do about it. But surely there's a proper etiquette for my situation. Maybe someone here has some experience or tips in this situation?
Jazakallah
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